(follows on from secret diary aged 14 3/4 and secret diary aged 13 3/4)
What a weekend it’s been. The Olympic excitement even got to
me on Saturday evening. I couldn’t help it. Every lap Jessica Ennis did on TV,
I did one round the sitting room with her. When she won and they were all
jumping up and down, I found myself rolling around on the floor with my legs in
the air, squealing with excitement. I got up on the settee for a snooze to
recover and then, blow me, Mo Farah won the 10,000m and I had to leap off and
do a lap of honour with him. What’s going on?
I’ve known for some time that I was a world class tap dancer
(Mum calls me Max Astaire), but this athletics stuff is all new. (Actually,
I’ve only known about the tap dancing since I had the spinal stroke jobbie last
autumn.) Mum says all four legs move independently of each other and I tap
dance with the front ones. No idea what she means, but it’s bound to be a
compliment. Max Astaire and Nina Rogers – I can see our names in lights now.
Perhaps then that delightful little minx will let me tup her.
Apparently it’s my 15th birthday today. People
seem to imply that’s old, but you should see some of them. Huh, they won’t see
15 again unless they start going backwards – and for a few decades at that.
Honestly, no respect some people.
I wonder if I’m going to get a decent walk today. I used to
get taken for miles at a time, but it doesn’t seem as if Mum can do that these
days, poor old girl. Most days it’s half an hour round the field. Nice, but a
bit repetitive if you know what I mean. Friday I thought we were never going to
go. Then, when she finally took us from the garden into the field, she faffed
around with the bonfire for ages. Served her right that when she stood up she
couldn’t see me. The delightful minx and the brat were gambolling about, but for
me a walk’s a walk. I know the route, so I’d gone off on my own. No way I’m
hanging about for that bunch. After a while, I think I must have gone uphill a
bit and reappeared because she caught sight of me and started laughing (why?),
and then ran to catch up.
